Oh my goodness! I can't stop thinking about Sam... I just...CAN'T!
And the deal is, he's a senior that I met at band camp, yes, I've said to Eli that I love him. But when I think about it really hard... I don't. I said it because he said it first, and that's what's expected of me. Oh and then there's James. (no conflicted feelings about him! He's just my buddy)
James is my sassy gay friend who isn't really gay, and I'm starting to wonder if he has a crush on me! Oh my god I'm so messed up!! And it's only freshman year... O_o I'm so dead
The thing is that I'm horrible at telling if people like me or not! I just can't do it!!!
Now, James made a reference that Sam liked me, but then he freaked out and was all like 'no wait!! He dons't like you that way! I didn't mean for it to come out like that!' And I'm just like,well shoot... What do I think now???
When I'm trying to fall asleep I find myself thinking of Sam more then Eli. I'm always thinking how I'm being so awkward around him! I always seem to mess up in some way. (Not that that's limited to only him. I just say socially awkward things at random times to everyone. Including teachers... ugh)
Example:
(little history)
the way we met was that at band camp he always seemed to be where I was, someone pointed out that he was stalking me (he wasn't it was totally coincidental) and it just kind of became our thing (dear lord do you hear me!?!? 'our thing' I'm so scrwed) even now that school has started he just seems to always be RIGHT THERE. It's pretty funny, but after the football game yesterday he just showed up next to me and was like "I'm not doing this on purpose I swear" so I said "ya we have to stop meeting like this!" he said "so we should plan it?"
I totally did not grasp what had just escaped my lips *face palm* of course me, being my awkward self, went on about how if we did plan it then we probably would never see each other. It would be like some crazy rivirse phycology thing.
When I think about it some more I relize that, I don't 'love' Eli, and I'm pretty sure its wacked out hormones that are all obssessed with Sam. Ugh but Sam has ABS.
Dear lord I even pointed out that he had a happy trail... -_- I so don't understand half the words I say. OK!?!? I just read something about a happy trail in a book so when I saw that Sam had a happy trail it reminded me of Daemon... *shivers* Daemon <3
Back to the point!!!! Yes, I am an idiot. A very awkward idiot. Who thinks sex is cool and terrifying cause it creates life! And... well ya. So I'm deffinitly a conflicted hormonal teen.
Mmmmm Daemon ;) ya read Obsidian by Jennifer L. Armentrout
Love y'all
~Rose
And the deal is, he's a senior that I met at band camp, yes, I've said to Eli that I love him. But when I think about it really hard... I don't. I said it because he said it first, and that's what's expected of me. Oh and then there's James. (no conflicted feelings about him! He's just my buddy)
James is my sassy gay friend who isn't really gay, and I'm starting to wonder if he has a crush on me! Oh my god I'm so messed up!! And it's only freshman year... O_o I'm so dead
The thing is that I'm horrible at telling if people like me or not! I just can't do it!!!
Now, James made a reference that Sam liked me, but then he freaked out and was all like 'no wait!! He dons't like you that way! I didn't mean for it to come out like that!' And I'm just like,well shoot... What do I think now???
When I'm trying to fall asleep I find myself thinking of Sam more then Eli. I'm always thinking how I'm being so awkward around him! I always seem to mess up in some way. (Not that that's limited to only him. I just say socially awkward things at random times to everyone. Including teachers... ugh)
Example:
(little history)
the way we met was that at band camp he always seemed to be where I was, someone pointed out that he was stalking me (he wasn't it was totally coincidental) and it just kind of became our thing (dear lord do you hear me!?!? 'our thing' I'm so scrwed) even now that school has started he just seems to always be RIGHT THERE. It's pretty funny, but after the football game yesterday he just showed up next to me and was like "I'm not doing this on purpose I swear" so I said "ya we have to stop meeting like this!" he said "so we should plan it?"
I totally did not grasp what had just escaped my lips *face palm* of course me, being my awkward self, went on about how if we did plan it then we probably would never see each other. It would be like some crazy rivirse phycology thing.
When I think about it some more I relize that, I don't 'love' Eli, and I'm pretty sure its wacked out hormones that are all obssessed with Sam. Ugh but Sam has ABS.
Dear lord I even pointed out that he had a happy trail... -_- I so don't understand half the words I say. OK!?!? I just read something about a happy trail in a book so when I saw that Sam had a happy trail it reminded me of Daemon... *shivers* Daemon <3
Back to the point!!!! Yes, I am an idiot. A very awkward idiot. Who thinks sex is cool and terrifying cause it creates life! And... well ya. So I'm deffinitly a conflicted hormonal teen.
Mmmmm Daemon ;) ya read Obsidian by Jennifer L. Armentrout
Love y'all
~Rose
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